Today I was dared to demonstrate love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between me and my husband and to tell him I am putting his preference first.
My husband and I often disagree. I have joked that we approach nothing in the same way but that at our core, we are the same because at the end of the day, we both want the same things and we both believe the same things. So, obviously, this was a serious dare for me. I didn't think the dare meant something big when we disagree on so much, so I chose to look at the day-to-day kind of circumstances that find my husband and I at odds.
What issue did you choose?
I chose today to monitor everything I said to my husband through his view. Like, instead of strongly standing up for what I think about something that he thinks differently on, I listened and said things like, "I can see that" or "That makes sense." I didn't say I was giving his ideas preference, I instead showed him that by not arguing my point. By accepting that his point of view was different but equally valuable and valid because they were his.
What did giving in cost you?
The cost was minimal compared to the gain because I was able to have a "big issue" discussion with my husband today that did not turn into a heated debate or hurt feelings or angry words. That was lovely. It was a agree to disagree sort of thing but for us, it was just lovely. I enjoyed it very much and any time I felt myself getting frustrated, I would remind myself of the dare and I dared myself to be open and quiet and rational and it was lovely.
How will this help you in the future?
I think this will be a great help in the future because I learned it really doesn't matter if we disagree or approach things differently. It really does not matter because what matters most, are the things we agree on. Our faith, our beliefs, our family, our future.
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